Livre d'Or

Yes, yes, that's a very valid point, people are allowed to have boundaries and that isn't the same thing as kink-shaming. Looking at the bits of the discussion that pertain to Yuletide letters specifically, it does sometimes seem like people are genuinely afraid that if they don't specify they're going to get stories deliberately pitched to be as horrifying and upsetting as possible.

I do see what you mean about pressure, and people stating hard boundaries because they have the experience of feeling uncertain about something and getting pushed into it anyway. I feel like there's some degree of difference between stuff you don't want to do and stuff you don't want to read about, but even so, people shouldn't be pressured into reading stuff they find upsetting just because having that boundary makes them not cool. (I've never seen Sex & the City but yes, unadventurous people do get mocked.)