Livre d'Or

Hoping I'm not being further intrusive: I find the presentation-policing for men, at least in North American/Western European culture and cultures heavily influenced thereby (I have no ability to speak to others) to actually simply be an offshoot of that for women, in that men are not allowed to be women, and thus not allowed to be overtly sexual or decorative in any way that women are culturally assumed to be at all times. Caring too much for your appearance or wearing things beyond the general shapeless shirt-and-trousers on which all quote-unquote "western" men's clothing is built is seen as "feminine" or even "girly" - and thus, of course, "gay" and absolutely forbidden and, as you note, often enforced with violence.

So it's still very related, ime, to "women's bodies are for THIS, and we assume a straight-man's gaze on the world, so other men's bodies aren't ALLOWED to be for THIS."