SF gender

[liv]

So I read Ian McDonald's River of gods about a month ago, and although I was extremely impressed with it, I never got round to posting a review. I think that's partly because I bounced about it at cartesiandaemon and rysmiel while I was reading it, and partly because I'm disorganized. But it's an absolutely fascinating and highly original book.

Anyway, among the explosion of exciting SF ideas, one of them is the concept of "nutes" who "Step Away" from gender, by a surgical and psychological process more or less analogous to an extreme version of sex reassignment surgery in our reality. I just can't get out of my head that if that gender existed, I would want to be it.

I mean, I know the medical technology described in the book is totally unrealistic, including physically rewiring the brain so that it doesn't even think gendered thoughts, not to mention remodelling the entire skeleton. And even it were possible, it would be a totally stupid idea; the book postulates, I'm sure correctly, that nutes are almost universally hated and regarded as freaks. It's perfectly obvious that I'm much, much safer looking like a moderately attractive woman than in a body that would upset everybody by being even more gender rebellious than any genderqueer person can ever manage in reality. People who know me well know I'm not as female in my head as I look, but I don't have to deal with the prejudices of any random strangers based on my appearance, and that's really the optimum situation. I also really don't need to be convincing myself not to do something that isn't even slightly an option!

Somebody said to me recently that if I have to hesitate to remember that I'm supposed to be female, that makes me gender dysphoric. To me that seems like comparing feeling a bit melancholy sometimes with actual clinical depression; I generally quite like my body and it's not even slightly a hardship being regarded as a woman. Thinking wistfully about how it would be nice to be able to opt out of gender is no more serious than vaguely speculating about whether telepathy or invisibility would be a cooler superpower. And realistically, even with existing technology I could present as a lot more androgynous if I chose to, and I don't think it's worth the hassle in order to look more like the person in my head. And really, even in RoG, it's a choice between male, female and social outcast, which isn't a whole lot better than having only two options.

Don't know if I'm actually going anywhere with this; the main point is that if you are interested in my review, it's linked.

Comments

[lumiere.livejournal.com]

I imagine you're familiar with the asexual (http://www.asexuality.org/home/) community?

[liv]

Thing is, asexual is exactly what I'm not. I'm very sexual, I'm just (mildy) annoyed with the fact that it is generally regarded as impossible to express sexuality without also expressing gender. Every time I act on my sexuality I'm assumed to be acting as a woman; my attraction for women is parsed completely differently from my attraction for men, for example, whereas to me it's the same basic feeling. I can't play a submissive role and ignore the whole history of women being expected to be sexually submissive.

And if I try to explain why this bothers me, people (it's not just you, it's something that happens a lot) leap to the conclusion that if I'm not interested in being sexual as a woman, I must not be interested in sex at all. That's why I was very drawn to the idea of the nutes in River of gods; they are extremely sexual, even hypersexual (in an analogy of real world gay culture before homosexuality became at least vaguely accepted in the mainstream), but on their own terms. They have reprogrammed their endocrine system so that they have a completely novel, and not gendered, hormonal response to certain kinds of touch. The have no genitals or secondary sex characteristics. I don't know if I would want to go that far or not; I like having breasts! I just don't like the way that breasts make me female, and suddenly create this entire system of roles and responses, which I have to either follow or transgress, when really I just want to be me.

It's not only about sex, though it's most acute when it comes to sex. For many people it seems to be actually unthinkable to contemplate the possibility of being sexual but not gendered. And in the real world as opposed to a near-future novel, it is pretty much impossible not to be gendered, gender is everywhere. But I think it's at least possible to want not to be as heavily gendered as I am.

[lumiere.livejournal.com]

I was misled, then, by the term "nute", not having read the books, as it suggests neuter, and neutered animals generally lose interest in sex. (Though on consideration, it's not clear that would be true for humans; consider the castrati (http://www.amazon.com/Cry-Heaven-Anne-Rice/dp/0345396936), after all.)

Are you trying to convey a self-identity that's dual-gendered (androgenous, hermphroditic, or otherwise) or agendered? You're going back and forth between the two some, and it's not clear to me which you mean.